Often, extremely mean people who admire and wish to be like them toss their desire away, insisting that it is impossible to achieve. They assume that it is a unique trait of individual personality attributed to them by nature. But is not true; being likable or knowing how to be a likable person only requires unlearning and learning certain behaviors or attitude that entices people toward you.
You don’t need to be superficial, intelligent, or overly smart to be a likable person. All you need to do is to eschew bad habits that generally repel people co-existing with you, and then embrace behaviors that encourage people to draw closer to you. This involves little things that bring sparkles or makes a difference in the life of people.
How to become a likable person?
The following are behaviors that will make you a likable person:
1. They are not conscious of being liked and they don’t seek recognition:
The beautiful thing about being likable is that just like any other behavioral patterns, it comes with cues that anyone can take, and once you do, you are likely to start attracting people to like you. But remember, being so conscious of being liked would make you act overtly in excess, and that would drive people away from you. People who do this show off their self to be recognized. They pride their self wherever people are in buoyancy to be noticed.
This will rather irritate people than it will make you appear appealing to them. So the best thing to do is to stay humble, be who you are and don’t be an unwanted peacock.
2. They pay attention to detail:
You have to pick every detail that will be favorable to your relationship with the person whether long or short term. People are very conscious of this, and making use of this to influence your meeting with them positively creates an impression that you find them fascinating or interesting.
All you have to do is to pay attention to know who they are, what they are, how they are, and complement them if it is in line with your conversation at the time. Make positive remarks about them. This could be hard, but if your emotional intelligence is well-groomed, then you are good to go.
3. They put away distraction:
I guess you must have experienced having someone engrossed in his phone leaving you all by yourself in the middle of a conversation. If it were a close friend whom you are always
with you might feel peeved, but not with someone you just met. You will feel crazy and irritated about the person. It will probably turn you off.
Distractions could come spontaneously, but being consistently taken away by objects, or present or past event speaks an audible language of ignorance. It is not something you watch happen and hope you apologize, rather, it is something you avoid. This is because you can’t pick details if you are distracted.
If you can put away every distraction to commit yourself to the person or people around with a dedication to make them feel they are wanted, then you will earn a star of likableness.
Everyone indeed needs someone to talk to, but no one wants to talk with a person who has a preconceived perception that would cause prejudiced judgment about who they are. If you are that way; going around throwing biased judgment based on misconceptions, then you are bound to have people duck out of sight from you.
Open-minded people are amiable, being that they are easily accessed and approached. They are given to people’s opinions and are not judgmental. They give you room to change and see you in the light of who you are, in order words, they are empathic enough to understand the why of people.
5. Being relevant in your environment:
Let your value speak for you. People are going to come after you if you are reliable, and have what it takes to establish a good relationship.
Developing your potentials for mutual existence will grow your level of importance. Using it to influence your environment positively will make people want and desire to be around you.
6. Ask relevant questions
When you are in a conversation with people, asking questions particular to the theme of your discussions shows how much attention you pay to what they are saying. They would want to open up to you and pour out their heart. They understand your inquisition to have a vivid view of what they are saying as an act of undivided attention and interest. Bet me, you are going to see them coming back to you
Most times, it is good you listen more, talk less, and ask more relevant questions to seek clarity.
7. A welcoming, heartfelt, warmth facial expression:
You are not Hitler; even if you were, you are still human and you are far from being an Orangutan, so put a smile on your face. A good one brightens the souls and lights up the dark edges of the heart. You never know whom your bright-face good morning would lift from shackles of sadness.
A good facial expression calls people out into a bosom of friendship. It is a language every tribe understands. Also, sometimes, you might not be in a talker’s mood, but with a good and well-pronounced smile on your face, you can relate to people in a way most audible to the heart.
8. They speak enthusiastically:
Likable people oftenspeak sonorously regardless of their voice texture. They speak with ebullience and at the same time are lively. They are not comedians but have their little way of getting you excited.
Wouldn’t you want to be with someone that kept your mouth ajar in laughter in your first meeting? I guess you would. Their enthusiasm is a pack of happiness that they use for getting likeness approval from people they meet daily.
9. They are willing to help people:
Likable people are giving to making things go smoothly for the people they meet. They offer to help even when they are not asked. This is a golden quality that will make people like and feel indebted to you.
In conclusion, there is more to getting people to like you, but you will learn along the way. The most important thing is being who you or changing if whom you are is not good enough.