“If a man knows a woman’s mind, a sow can do pole vaulting.”
Life has been so hard, Sister AI still needs to give you a critical hit on this weekend.
Yesterday, a male fan added my WeChat and said, “I don’t understand what that girl wants. I can buy her all the bags, clothes and cosmetics she wants. I’m so rich why doesn’t she want to be with me?”
Since you have money, the rest of the reasons are simply that you are not handsome enough or not strong. The last situation is that you have money, but you are not very rich.
Two people can be together or not depends on whether the needs of two people are the same. For this kind of needs, it is nothing more than Maslow’s demand level theory: ① physiological needs ② safety needs ③ social needs ④ respect needs ⑤ self realization needs.
What’s the difficulty of falling in love?! If you want to take a test of a psychologist, a master’s degree, a doctor’s degree or a graduate student, you can easily find out the other person’s mind
No, I’m sorry. It’s hard for you to think about it.
So it’s reasonable to ask you to add Sister AI’s WeChat to do consulting at ordinary times. Today, Sister AI will tell you five kinds of needs in love. Sit on the bench and prepare for the class!!!!
Most people fall in love because of their physiological needs: beautiful leather bags, interesting leather bags, and gilded leather bags, depending on which one you like.
For example, after people get up in the morning, some people just need to eat a bun, some people have to drink soup, eat cake and add an egg. Different requirements for life have different physiological needs.
Of course, breakfast is just an example. In fact, when many things in life are integrated, there is a universal artifact to improve the quality of life, that is “money”! Simple, rough and unreasonable. That’s why “money” often plays a decisive role in the interaction between men and women.
But money is not everything. When the other party’s bottom line can’t buy with money, money is insignificance.
We often see people’s appearance. If one is ugly as hell! Counterproductive level of ugliness! Then no matter how excellent you are, there’s nothing you can do about it.
To give another example: a girl born into a wealthy family. She is good at poetry, music, chess, calligraphy and painting, but also knows C++. No matter how rich the guy is, if he doesn’t know C++, he won’t attract her.
Some people will definitely say: if this man is so good, what does this guy need to know C++?
That’s where a lot of people get it wrong. They always judge what the other person wants only from their own perspective, instead of trying to find out what the ther person wants? A guy like that will never be able to win in love.
In fact, security is also a sense of security. Many girls must have a house and a car when they get married, while some girls don’t care.
This has nothing to do with greed. Girls think about the guarantee of life after marriage with children, while boys say that girls are material. At this time, this boy will make the girl lose psychological safety because of his psychological immaturity, and finally lead to emotional rupture.
The security needs of early love are more: give me the sense of security that you will not leave;
The security needs of mid-term love are more: give me a sense of life security.
The security needs of later love are more: give me, your sense of security to your family.
The satisfaction of safety needs can give people spiritual security and comfort, so that there will be no worries and problems in future life.
In social life, it is inevitable for people to compete with each other for power and profit to gain the envy, jealousy and fear of others.
Generally speaking, men can help women improve their living status faster, such as good cars and houses. This has changed into a social status in the later interpersonal communication.
The direct benefit of social status for women is that they can instantly improve their social status, so as to gain a favorable position in friends’ social life. It is a magic weapon that makes their opponents feel inferior and change their fate. This status and strength is also a powerful weapon for those aunts who like to be humble and compare with each other to shut up.
Social status can bring more benefits and fun. For people who can really “play” this kind of social psychology, they will create their own social initiative with the help of each other’s lowliness and fear, and then through social mechanics, they can reach unwritten rules that are beneficial to their own side.
For example, “I have money and power. If you don’t depend on me, don’t try to live a good life.”
The so-called vanity makes these players enjoy themselves at this level.
This part of the population attaches great importance to the spiritual level and the evaluation of others.
I’m fat, but you can’t say I’m fat. I’m short, but you can’t say I’m short. Even if it’s a joke,you can’t do that. You should give me enough face and respect, so that my heart can be comforted.
This kind of emotion will develop to the extreme, which will produce the morbid thought of “virgin complex”, “virgin complex” and “you can cheat physically, but you should make sure that you love me mentally”.
If this happens, it will be troublesome to deal with it. You can contact Sister AI privately for specific solutions.
Giving enough respect to each other can satisfy people in the spiritual level of life, make people full of confidence in themselves, full of enthusiasm for the society, and experience the useful value of their lives.
Self fulfilling needs
The need for self realization is the highest level of need, which refers to the need to realize personal ideals and aspirations, to maximize the ability of individuals, to enhance the ability to solve problems, to improve self-consciousness, to be good at doing things independently and to complete all things commensurate with their own ability.
You want the man to have money, a car, a house and a stable job, but you don’t have any resources. Aren’t you afraid that the man will leave you at last“
“I’m afraid, so I have to work hard.The most important thing is I need to be excellent.”
“Yeah, it’s so good for everyone to get along as equals when they have the strength.”
“When I have the strength, why do I have to look at the man’s face?”
Believe me, this is the answer of most girls, so if you want to occupy the dominant position in love, you have to make a hundred times effort.
In fact, most people stay at the stage of physiological needs when they are in love.
Some people will ask, the role of men is to provide benefits for women to meet it?
No, whoever wants to be dominant in a relationship will have to provide satisfaction for the interests of the other party, so that there is a reason for the other party to admire you.
But there is a special situation that can break all these rules, that is, the legendary “love”, pure love.
She likes grapes. Even if you give her a big watermelon, she doesn’t accept it.
So if you really have this kind of trouble, come to consult me!